A PA's Revenge

I wouldn’t dub myself a vulgar girl,
In fact I’d say I’m usually quite sweet.
A calm and inoffensive soul am I,
With only lovely phrases to repeat.
But working in this office drives me mad,
My hair is falling out, my nails bit;
And so to let off steam, I’ll write a verse,
An office full of morons to befit…

You fucking useless, empty minded c***s!
You stupid, witless lazy bags of shite!
Dismal, worthless, wretched, old and foul,
Would it kill you once to be polite?
*****, nasty, nosey, noxious twat,
****, bilious, balding, boring tool,
*****, rotund, revolting, vile bitch,
******, pointless, petty, pompous fool!

Incipid, idle, workshy to a man!
Redundant, red faced, rancid load of jerks!
You wonder why I’m scowling as I stand,
Surrounded by retards like you at work??
But let me save the last verse for my boss,
A truly spiteful, cruel and vicious git;
Unsympathetic, childish and cold,
This is for you, you heartless little sh*t...

*****, you’re contemptible and mean,
No soul inside with spirit null and void,
Plus the sort of ghastly jarring laugh
That people cross whole planets to avoid!
Offensive, dull, deliberately obtuse,
Unpleasant, greedy, infantile buffoon;
If I never saw your face again,
It’d be a hundred thousand years too soon!

You watch - I’ll get a better job than this!
Oh mark my words, soon you will RUE the day
That you forgot to show some thanks to me
And all your malice, swiftly I'll repay!
For one day I will OWN this company!!
And one day I will be your fucking boss!!
Then we will see who’ll minute your dismay,
'Cause by then, trust me, I won’t give a toss!!!!

You bastards.